Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Another Seedy Post

As a caucasian, heterosexual, right-handed American male in his mid-forties, I really can’t claim to have personal experience with being the target of prejudice (being a liberal in Idaho certainly qualifies as being a member of a minority, but being disliked by a group largely consisting of backward-ass hicks is something I welcome). Nevertheless, one need not be the victim of injustice to recognize it and fight for its eradication. (Plus, I was in Mississippi in the mid-60s during the race riots … granted, I was a newborn, but when my little fists were clinched, I’m pretty sure it was in anger over the fact that my darker-skinned infant brethren had to play in a separate crib.)

It can be emotionally crushing when one discovers that one’s behaviors are not consistent with what one considers to be fair, just, and compassionate beliefs. And crushed I was, then, upon realizing that I’ve been supporting racist practices on this blog and in my life.

I recently extolled the virtues of watermelon as a breakfast food, and made mention of the seedless variety. Indeed, I generally buy the seedless melons. It has, however, recently occurred to me that the industry takes great liberties with the word “seedless,” and it is my acceptance of “seedless” as meaning something other than “without seeds” that has led to my moral failure.

Let’s take a look at some visual evidence:


Above: A traditional seeded watermelon. A true classic.


Above: A legitimate seedless watermelon. Other than the questionable science of creating a fruit that can’t reproduce, nothing too objectionable.

Now look at what I’ve been purchasing, advertised as seedless:


Above: Oh, you white seeds are fine. It’s just them other ones we’s askeered of.

While I’ll have to live with the shame of turning my back to such obvious racism, it’s never too late to try to do the right thing. I will personally return, and demand recompensation for, any “seedless” watermelons grown under the “whites only” policy, and I urge you to do the same. As Edmund Burke stated so eloquently, all that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing.

Let us do something – let us work toward a more tolerant world, a world where we are judged not by the color of our seeds, but by our ripeness and flavor.

Let us begin with the melons.

8 comments:

Niamh B said...

I'm curious as to why you ever wanted seedless in the first place? Did someone tell you the seeds would grow into a melon tree in your stomach that would sprout out of your belly button?
Cos that's what happened me with apples.

Kirsten said...

What if our local supermarket doesn't enforce affirmative action for our dark seeded workers? Must there be a Million Melon March? MLK: "I have a seeeed..."

Another great post. Love it! ;)

The Dead Acorn said...

As a matter of fact, I was told that. Are you implying that it's not true?

And apple seeds are poisonous, in addition to their growing in your belly.

The Dead Acorn said...

Thanks, Kirsten! I would never presume to know what Dr. King would have thought about this, but I like the idea of the Million Melon March. Only through action can we stop seedism.

Niamh B said...

No, not at all, just that it would explain your nervousness.
And when I say that's what happened me with apples, I mean I grew an apple tree one time, and yes, I was poisoned too, so I can verify that all you've heard is true.

Domestic Oub said...

Well, obviously melon technology is far more advanced in the US - I currently have a watermelon sitting (and taking up the entire) fruitbowl, and it's got all its God given seeds intact. We were given no alternative!

The Dead Acorn said...

DO - I'm becoming more of a Luddite re: watermelons ... maybe some things should be left as nature created them. That said, though, I do admit to being a bit taken with the square ones:

http://www.instructables.com/id/Grow-a-square-watermelon/

Domestic Oub said...

oh, they're cool.

Wonder if I could do that to one of the kids...